Photos: Georgia

Position: 41°55’33″N 45°29’08″E

Cat pee. That’s what Simcoe hops taste like, cat pee. Their powerful, unmistakable flavour is typically added at the end of fermentation to give an IPA an added ‘oomph’. Sipping the first true craft beers we’d had since leaving America last September, the barman and brewer leaned forward and said, ‘You know, if you leave a review, you can have a free shot.’ ‘A free shot of what?’ we asked. ‘Jaeger, vodka, or a local specialty that I make.’ ‘Give us that, the last one!’ we said as we dived for our phones.

‘Where are you from?’ the gentleman to my right enquired. The shot of homemade fruit-infused grappa loosened our tongues and we gave him the full three-minute precis of Aleta, sailing and horsing around Turkey and Georgia in a rented car for five months. ‘This is your first time to Georgia? What are your plans? Are you going to Telavi?’ Giving him a tourist’s open mouthed, adenoidal stare of incomprehension, he pulled out his phone, fired up Google maps, and proceeded to tell us the highlights of a three-day excursion to the north. We thanked him as he warned us to keep an eye out for saboteurs.

Had we arrived two weeks later in a Toyota Land Cruiser with fat knobby tires and a well-stocked gun rack, the hinterlands might have been at our disposal. But snow fell heavily and smothered our ambitions. Given the conditions, and respecting the advice of everyone we spoke with, we hired a driver to take us out of Tbilisi and into the countryside.

TELAVI

The heart of wine country. Georgians will tell you they’ve been making wine for 8,000 years. That they invented it. I can’t say if that’s true or not, but the vast acres of vines lay testimony to their seriousness about it. To this day, they ferment wine naturally in huge clay amphoras buried in the ground to maintain a constant temperature.

The new wine is decanted and shipped to bottlers who complete the fermentation and blending process, package it and ship it all over the world. Fifteen bucks gets you some fantastic vintage wines. Two bucks in a restaurant buys you a litre of drinkable vino de tavola. Given its provenance, the bulk wine from Saperavi grapes hover around 12% alcohol and generally won’t knock you on your butt too hard. Seeing as its free of sulphites, your head stays a little clearer, too.

Monasteries in the area near Telavi also get in on the winemaking game. One such we visited had entered a joint venture with a big European vintner. They fund church renovations, while the monks grow grapes and incant hymns. Seems like an arrangement the big guy upstairs would approve of.

SIGNAGI

aka. Love City – in the ‘I Heart Signagi’ sense of love city. A rebranding effort from 2010-ish worked. Now this little hilltop town is a [insert Georgian Orthodox equivalent to Mecca here] for shotgun weddings and romantic honeymooners. Perched high above the snowline, the town’s climate remains a little cooler in summer encouraging all kinds of al fresco activities, like zip lining, wine tasting, and pigging out on fantastic Georgian cuisine at any of a dozen good restaurants. The things they do with walnuts and eggplants in this country reward even the most reluctant diner. Had the weather lifted, the views would be spectacular. We made do with pretty awesome.

MTSKHETA

Just outside Tbilisi is the original capital of Georgia, Mtskheta. A word pronounced just as it’s written. Vendors surround the ancient city walls, inside of which stands a massive cathedral. For the first time we saw the full, richly ambitious beauty of ancient Byzantine frescos maintained lovingly for centuries. Sadly, all the decent coffee was back in Tbilisi.

TBILISI

Returning to the current capital of Georgia, we finished our tour of every low hanging attraction we could walk to. That included a quick march uphill to the Mother of Georgia, a metal sculpture of female perfection as imagined by a man. She stands high above the city watching over the cable car’s stepping off point. To her right is the crumbling fortress, guarded by some of the most handsome stray dogs we’ve encountered to date. Georgian strays differ from Turkish ones by their sheer variety. Big, small, spotted, terrier, shepherds, corgis, you name it. Friendly and amenable to a good neck rub, we ran out of treats in minutes.